Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
farters have to be the big spoon...
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize