You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize