I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize