Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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