I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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