some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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