bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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