"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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