I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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