i always forget guys have bellybuttons
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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