So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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