If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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