It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
