you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this boner is exhausting
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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