Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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