so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
