well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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