Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
North Korea, Best Korea!
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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