god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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