it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
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