5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Randomize
