but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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