Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
