My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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