Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Randomize
