All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
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