It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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