That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize