oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Randomize
