Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN