i permit you to call me
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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