do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
