Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(858): View more from California

So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?

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(319): View more from Iowa

Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?

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(719): View more from Colorado

I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"

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(925): View more from California

These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.

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(208): View more from Idaho

i robbed the continental breakfast last night

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(217): View more from Illinois

I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck

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(260): View more from Indiana

how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?

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(727): View more from Florida

I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?

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(360): View more from Washington

Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.

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