Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize