just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
