Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
