Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
