Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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