too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
