you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
