i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
