She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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