Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Randomize
