No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
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that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
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Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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