You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
