I have demons in me.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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