You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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