If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize