Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize