Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Randomize
