Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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